Superman is Full of Crap

When I was six, Strawberry Shortcake was my perpetual hero and the personification of all that was good in life. By day, she kicked the Purple Pie Man’s ass. By night, she slept on my pillow, infusing the air with the most delicious faux-strawberry aroma you could ever imagine. Every morning, I would brush her […]

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I Wish You Nothing But the Best As You Take Over the World

Dear World Domination Summit, We need to talk. I love you. Deeply. Every time I am around you, I return a better human being. The speakers on your stage are always phenomenal. The values that you stand for are inspiring. Adventure. Service. Community. Check. Check. Check. The city where you live, Portland, is delightfully eccentric. […]

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